What would life be like without our people? Not worth it.
My people include my furry people that keep us laughing with their
antics. The main benefit to having my
own bed in Flame is that Tigger sleeps with me.
I have explained to him that it is an open invitation as he is such a
good sleeper, curling at my feet and staying put. I can’t make too much of a ruckus about it as
Roscoe is not a good sleeper and if I boisterously invite Tigger then Roscoe
will jump up too. Roscoe likes to sprawl
and twitches all night. Tigger is
still. Often, Tigger starts on his dog
bed (yes, we cracked the code) then ends up with me. I take great comfort in his warmth on my
toes. David is a no dogs on the bed
fella. My bed is now my domain. David and I snuggle across the narrow aisle –
and yes, twin beds will not be forever once we build our tiny tiny house.
I have the first part of the day at home and am quite happy
about that. I am now officially behind
on two writing projects. I haven’t
worked on my Intro again since last week.
It only needs a few tweaks and then I will send it in for review. And, I have another project which is waking
me in the night and infiltrating my sleep… I said “yes” to a workshop Kristina
Hall is running where 8 other women and I will each have our own mini-version
of a one-woman show in the form of 7 minutes at the microphone in a real
venue. Oh my goodness what ever had me
say yes? What I haven’t mentioned yet,
is it’s a comedy show. Eeeeeegads. Kristina is a brilliant professional comic
with over 17 years experience in front of live audiences all over the world and
on TV. She is pretty much the funniest
person I have ever known. I have seen
her perform live dozens of times and never ever get tired of her material. Recently, I interviewed her on my radio show
and we talked about her life as a comic and a writer as well as her mission to
allow other women to be free in our expression on stage. Thus the workshop – and at a time in my life
where I am breaking through even more barriers – thus my call to say
“yes”. The caveat for the show and the
course – authentic material only. We
take the issues of our lives and bring it all to the stage. We also are learning the structure of a joke
and that’s where my blood runs cold. If
you have been reading for a while, you know I bring in my own brand of
humor. I am good at this off-the-cuff
stuff in both my writing and speaking.
But crafting it, then remembering it to present it? Oh my.
It seems the moment I put pen to paper all funny eludes me.
Of course, I will talk about the fire. And, we know there isn’t much that is funny
about a forest fire. But I will draw on
the absurd – what people say, my angsty PTSD moments and internal dialogue, the
inane and insane. I have ideas and
real-life situations to share but I haven’t put it all together in a cohesive
form. Two nights ago I dreamt that I
completely bombed. It was so so so
bad. Kristina has explained that in this
venue we won’t be able to see the audience due to the lights. In my dream, I couldn’t see them at all. They were below the stage and behind all
sorts of obstacles. I completely forgot
about the microphone and paced all over the stage, rambling and stumbling over
my words, forgetting all the punch lines – and no one was laughing. At all. Crickets.
Not even a chuckle.
 |
| Flame peeking through the trees |
Early this morning, I dozed and dreamt of brilliant material
which of course I have completely forgotten. Soon, I will step away from my comfort of
writing this blog and into my discomfort of writing that material. Then I will review my intro and ready it for submission
tomorrow. I will I will I will. Deep breath with me, please. I pause for a moment and hear the wind
kicking up again. The wind isn’t
funny. It is eerie, fierce and a little
chilly. The sun warms me though, heating
up my silver bullet and calming my mind.
This sweet trailer is a lovely cocoon.
Next weekend, we will build her a flagstone patio apron to honor her beauty. We bought an umbrella and a little table
yesterday. We are creating a little
space of peace and comfort where David and I drank our coffee and soaked in the
still lovely view.
I glance out the window at stark black against lush green
that is our landscape. It’s dramatic and
raw. It’s also magical. I breathe in again – so nice to remember my
lungs have a larger capacity than I give them credit. I keep forgetting to inhale. Danger seems to lurk around corners but in these
peaceful moments, all is right with the world.
So what if I bomb on stage and say absolutely nothing
funny. I won’t die, right? If I don’t keep stretching myself, I am dying
anyway. Letting go of the outcome has to
be one of the gifts of this dang adventure.
It will go how it goes. I will
suit up and show up. I will stand in the
spotlight and test my mettle. I will
sleep the night before or I won’t. I
will suck or I will shine – or maybe both.
It will not kill me. If you are
in Denver, come join us at the D-Note in Old Towne Arvada on the 5th
at 7:30 pm. If you can’t be there,
please send me some funny.
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